Alcohol and Amazon Don’t Mix: The Unbelievable Cost of Drunken Shopping

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Drunk shopping
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The only things on my mind when I’m drunk is pizza, spaghetti and how badly I have to pee (in that order, of course).

However, a few of my Snapchat friends’ intoxicated minds seem to have other agendas.

It isn’t unusual for me to watch someone’s Snapchat story on a Tuesday that features them opening random boxes with captions like, “LOL I DON’T REMEMBER ORDERING THIS ON SATURDAY NIGHT” or “LOL SOMEONE TAKE AWAY MY CREDIT CARD WHEN I’M DRUNK!!”

A new Finder.com survey shows my Snapchat friends aren’t alone in their drunk spending habits. A third of Americans admit to having shopped under the influence, and that number increases to nearly half for regular drinkers, according to the survey.

And yes, it’s as disastrous as it sounds.

Drunk Shopping is Seriously Costly

Drunk shoppers aren’t just buying stupid crap, like an umbrella hat or a live lobster to set free.

They’re spending significant money on things like clothes, shoes and gambling, according to the survey.

And just how significant, you ask?

The average amount drunk shoppers spend is $206. I’m cringing inside. That’s more than my car insurance premium. *facepalm*

Last year’s survey revealed that men tend to spend over four times as much as women, shelling out an average of $233 per drunk shopping spree. Women spend an average of $54.

Millennials aren’t the only ones doing it, either. While they account for 39% of the drunken shopping trend, Gen Xers ring in at 36% and Boomers at 18%.

Experts identify the convenience of online shopping, including one-click purchasing, to be a major driving factor behind intoxicated purchases.

Can’t we do something else while drunk? Like karaoke? Seriously.

5 Things to Do Instead of Drunk Shopping

If you feel so inclined to blow massive amounts of money that you’ll regret the next day, don’t worry — I’ve come up with five things you can do instead that won’t cost you a thing!

1. Go to bed. You’re drunk.

2. Reflect on the embarrassing decisions you made tonight.

3. Delete the photos and videos that made your Snapchat story 90 seconds long. (You’re probably going to do it tomorrow anyways, so why not get ahead of the game?)

4. Find something in your fridge to melt some cheese on.

5. Wash your face. (You’re welcome for the reminder.)

In all seriousness, though, blowing a chunk of change while drunk isn’t exactly a smart financial move. If you’re tempted to make major purchases after drinking, doing proactive things beforehand, such as deleting shopping apps from your phone, can help you resist.

Your Turn: What’s the craziest purchase you’ve ever made while intoxicated?

Kelly Smith is a junior writer and engagement specialist at The Penny Hoarder. Catch her on Twitter at @keywordkelly.